TMI

Of all the weirdness that is me I will share the following facts:

As a child I had a traumatic experience with beets that I still will not talk about but beets will never knowingly pass my lips. Seriously, beets scare me.

As a child, Dickie Cordell chased me and threw his ice cream cone at me and it hit my leg and stuck and slowly slid down my leg to my ankle. The gross part was that Dickie was the fat mean kid in our neighborhood and the cone was filled with Miracle Whip. I can't stand the stuff and even the smell of mayo makes me nauseous. How many people do you know have had not one but two traumatic experiences with food?

I love, I mean L O V E cheese popcorn but I don't like having my fingers turn orange, so I use chopsticks. Works with Cheetos too.

When I'm really relaxed and breathing deeply, my nose whistles. This is especially annoying as I am trying to go to sleep. Sometimes it even wakes me up.

I am incapable of remembering numbers of any kind. What was 6 last time will be 32 the next and 3 the time after. Never rely on me to judge distance.

I can't carry a tune in a bucket but I love to sing. When my son was little and I would sing to him, he would put his hand over my mouth and say "Momma, don't sing."

Once I start reading a book, I must finish it; no matter how bad it is. I am a compulsive reader. My ex had it written into his will that there be no printed material of any kind within eyesight of his casket. He envisioned me grieving at his casket when the little "Made in China" tag would catch my attention. OK, it's funnier when he tells it.

Which reminds me, I cannot tell a joke. I always blow it. They're never funny when I tell them.

How about you? What makes you "weird?"